What is wrong with my friend?
When someone you care about has cancer, it can feel scary, confusing, heavy, and out of your control. Your feelings are valid, and you don’t have to handle them alone.
Your friend did nothing to cause it, and you can’t catch cancer from them. Cancer is not contagious like a cold or flu. Your friend is still your friend; their body just has a problem right now.
Your friend has been diagnosed cancer. Inside everyone’s body are tiny building blocks called cells. These cells normally grow in an orderly way, like bricks being placed carefully to build a wall. Cancer happens when some cells start growing in the wrong way, too fast, and without stopping and they make it harder for the body to work well.
That is why your friend might feel very tired, look pale or smaller than usual, lose their hair during medicine treatment, miss school or activities and have to go to the hospital often.
Doctors are giving your friend special medicine and treatment to stop the unhealthy cells and help their body get stronger again. Sometimes the treatment takes a long time, and it can make them feel sick before they feel better.
Remember, your friend still cares about you and being kind, patient, and a good friend really helps. You cannot fix this for your friend, but your presence, kindness, and care already make a difference. You are not failing for finding this hard. You are human, and you care deeply. That’s love, not weakness.
There are lots of helpful resources out there to help you understand what's happening and even support a friend who has cancer. We used some of them as inspiration when writing these articles too. Here are some that we like:
CANSA. (n.d.) How do I support my friend who has cancer?
American Cancer Society. (n.d.). Being a Friend to Someone with Cancer.
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How do I cope as a friend?
Having a friend with cancer can stir up a lot of emotions, and that's completely okay. You're not alone, and there are things you can do to feel a bit steadier along the way. Here are some helpful approaches for you to cope with this difficult time.
I don’t understand my illness
Our bodies are made up of tiny blocks called cells. Our bodies are made up of tiny blocks called cells. When you have cancer, one of these cells in your body is growing faster than what they should. Normal cells grow, work and when our bodies don’t need them anymore, they die in a controlled way. A cancer cell doesn’t follow that rule and your body needs help to get rid of it.
Cancer is not contagious; you didn’t do anything to cause it.
Below are some interesting materials that you can check to better understand cancer.
What is happening to me?
You may ask: ‘Why is this happening to me? Will I be ok? Why do I have to go through this? What happens if I don’t get better?’